2 weeks ago, we hit one of my FAVORITE days of the year, the Iowa Women Lead Change conference in Eastern Iowa. My company has always been a sponsor of this event, but it wasn't until the last 4 years or so that I was even aware that it existed?? Well, I can tell you I've attended every one of them since I found out AND while I was willing to pay for myself to go? I actually insisted my work pay for this, as its an investment in my career AND my engagement and my company pretty much instantly recoups the expense with my increased engagement.
The headliner this year was Ginger Zee, the first chief meterologist on Good Morning America. Her beautifully told story of her struggles with depression and anxiety definitely hit close to home for me. She was a self-proclaimed profectionist/people-pleaser and discussed how those two personality features drove much of the anxiety and tumult of her life. Ginger was kind enough to provide some great take-away steps to use if you find yourself in a similar boat.
Put up your fence - when you are in that situation with other(s) and you feel yourself taking on THEIR problems/their emotions, imagine a fence rising up between the two of you. Its ok to be empathetic but you need to remind yourself that these are their problems to deal with and YOU don't own them OR own solving them, their problems stay on their side of the fence. A great example of this kind of thing in my own life? Darn near every morning when my night-owl teenager gets up to go to school and is starting to panic because she can't find <insert thing>. I have found this fence trick to be VERY helpful in not breaking down into nagging/yelling/chastising mom self.
Gratitude and Goals - Every day in the shower, Ginger writes on her glass shower wall what are the things she did well the day before and what does she want to work on/accomplish today. I really loved this and I know first-hand how beneficial taking time for gratefulness can be. I am NOT a night owl, and was always leaving this gratitude capture for end of the night, when I'm dead on my feet (so more often than not I skipped it). As an action out of the conference, I actually switched my gratitude journaling to first thing in the morning and I can already feel a difference in my spirit because of it.
Dial in the Big Picture Perspective - While Ginger had lots of other great tips, this was definitely my favorite. She mentioned how, being a new mom and on travel away from her baby, she was pumping breastmilk and the company had agreed to fedex back home for her baby. The morning of the conference, she had shipped out the box, only to find a few hours later, there was a mix up and the box had never gone out. For those of you moms out there, you can understand how this pretty much immediately put Ginger into a "mom-haze", world has fallen apart, nothing else matters. Ginger's trick? She asks 3 questions.
- Will this matter tomorrow? Well yes, because now my baby will have to eat sub-par nutrition.
- Will this matter new month? Mmm... probably not.
- Will this matter next year? No way.
If she gets to the 3rd question and the answer is NO? Then its one of the small things and you just need to let it go.
Ginger was so very fabulous and authentic, she inspired every one of the 1500 ladies (and handful of brave gentlemen) and I left the day ready to give back to the world.
The other highlight I captured from the event that really resonated for me as I approach my 40th birthday next month (still wondering what I want to do when I grow up...) One of the speakers noted during the conference that Martha Stewart, the juggernaut behind the "lifestyle industry", started her career journey at 40. BAM. There's always time to chase your dream.
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