15 minutes early, creating the habit of positivity

Soooo much goodness came from Women Lead Change conference, I think I have months of blog notes!!!  I'm going to start this series of posts focused on this take-away tip, WAKE UP 15 MINUTES EARLIER.   

The key to this tip though is not the waking up.  Its the "what you do" in the 15 minutes that really matters.  I'll admit this isn't a new concept to me, in fact its a practice I've been actively working on as my 2019 self-improvement goal.  Since I firmly believe in signs and this tip came up in several speakers' presentations though, I figured this would be a great opportunity to talk through here.

15 minutes early huh?  Doesn't sound like too big a challenge...  In fact, it seems small enough to  reasonably bite off in my daily habit.  The 15 minute wakeup has a distinct recipe in order to help you with setting the tone of your day as positive.

First 5 minutes?  Meditate.  Yes, it sounds easy.  However, we all probably recognize the distracted state our minds are in with our "multi-tasking" societal pressures.  Morning meditation gives you a chance right at the start of the day to practice giving your mind open space, and this is where the real, deep thoughts have an opportunity to formulate.  Meditation takes practice and patience, some days will work great, and others, like today for me, will be a constant attempt to refocus (squirrel, squirrel, squirrel).  I've been trying out Headspace for free but there are lots of options on the web for guided meditation.  Alternatively record your own meditation that works for you with a voice memo app on your phone.

Second 5 minutes? Read something that inspires you in a positive way.  Read about something you've wanted to learn (personal finances to support early retirement perhaps?)  Or something short and focused on the life you want to build (I am enjoying a book from the library called The Art of Simple Living, 100 practical tips from a Zen Monk and I read one tip a day).  The trick on this segment of time is stopping at 5 minutes.  :o)  I'll admit, I have officially started reading my 5 minutes of fun/inspirational material and it sometimes turns into getting to work an hour later than I intended to, eek!

Last 5 minutes? Move your body.  Stretch, do a series of yoga movements, or expand the timeframe and do your daily workout in the morning if you can motivate yourself to do so.  I remember my doctor telling me after my divorce that 30 minutes of exercise is equivalent to one anti-depressant.  I'll take movement, thank you very much!  And anything that gives me an endorphin high before heading to work seems like a good plan to me!  I like the Yoga Studio app, they have several "essentials courses" with varied time ranges that I can adjust to my available time window.

I've added a few more morning items to my routine (yes, its more than 15 minutes...) that I think are worth mentioning.  I start my day with GRATITUDE FRAMING.  I keep a gratitude journal and each morning I record on the left side of the page at least 3 things I'm thankful for from the day before, and on the right side of the page I list 3 reasons why today will be great.  If I have a particularly hard thing upcoming in the day, I'll write down how I envision the event playing out logistically with outcome being GREAT and by putting that intention out into the universe, I find it inevitably comes true!  The other thing I do is focus on my spiritual practice.  Since I am Christian, this means daily bible reading and prayer, which fits nicely into the reading/meditation times.

I've been on my 15 minutes early journey since January and I definitely feel its made a big difference in my daily happiness level.  In fact, I'm actually waking up an hour earlier than I had last year and it gives me plenty of ME time before the flurry of the day, setting the tone of the day off on the right foot. 

15 minutes a day, an investment in YOU.  YOU are WORTH it.

Investing In ME

Ahh, seasons of life.  I've been on a big upswing in life the past half a year and it shows right here, in the lack of blog posting.  I find when life is going spectacularly, I don't spend as much time in introspection and rumination (wow, those are big words coming out of my brain before 5am?!?  This coffee is GOOD!) 

Luckily, even in the midst of being on the mountain, I had the opportunity this week to attend Women Lead Change (WLC) and that one event single-handly drove me into the mental state of how can I become even more ME than I already am, so I can ultimately serve this world as I am meant to?

And that conference, whooweee, let me tell YOU.  I have, no kidding, 15 hand written pages of notes, so there's lots of learning I'll be doing as I reflect on all that GOODNESS that I plan to capture here (presuming I can read my own handwriting, eek). 

Let me just say, I have been attending WLC annually since 2014.  In fact, it is so inspirational, I've done 2 other blog posts on it, which you can find here and here! 

I'm extremely fortunate that my boss is willing to pay for me to attend this event (thank you Jade!)  Even if she didn't, I would pay for it myself as it is a SURE way to fire up my passion, fill my soul and get me going on high speed for months!  I decided after my divorce, about 5 years ago now, that I was going to put ME first on my list.   My company has long been a sponsor of the Women Lead Change event and I first found out about the event the year I got divorced, via an email that went out regarding my company's lottery for tickets.  They had a surplus that year and at last minute were trying to give them out.  The "free ticket" comes with a caveat: you must volunteer in some way at the event, which usually means you MISS one of the amazing speakers.  Well, I managed to belatedly score a ticket to first conference that didn't require volunteering.  I had an amazing time and now knew that to get a ticket, I'd have to make sure I was in the lottery pool.  The very next year, I put myself on the lottery list the day the email came out and I NEVER GOT A TICKET.   It was at that moment, I recognized that if I didn't care about my learning and development, no one else was going to. 

Its the only year I've missed since 2014.

Every year since, I started sending my leader the request for my department to buy me a ticket.  I'm not going to feel guilty about asking to spend 2 days focusing just on me.  And my company paying for me to go to WLC is a no-brainer return on investment.  Lets talk about the return on investment in a concrete way other than subjectively. 

SHOW ME THE DATA!

The conference was $550 and 2 days out of office, which we will estimate is $1600 of lost productivity at work.

Total Cost to company = $2100

Now lets say I'm just a "little more engaged" at work. 

Did you know the average worker spends up to 3 hours a day in work drama where they don't make forward progress? For the sake of this ROI, I improve just 10% on that 3 hours of lost productivity and that goodness lasts for 6 months.

Engagement boost = 3 hours/day * 10% improvement * $100/hr = $30/day * 6 months = $3600

ROI = (effort's gain or loss / cost of effort)  * 100% = ($3600 -2100) / $2100  *100 % = 71% ROI

Last I checked, 7% ROI on the stock market is considered a very good investment... 

71%? Unheard of. 

The really powerful thing here?  Everything I learned at the conference doesn't just go away after 6 months.  Its now my new operating norm which means MY individual return continues and compounds as I use these techniques to help those around me in the workforce unleash THEIR best selves!

So don't ever feel guilty for asking for an investment in YOU. 

YOU are WORTH it. Own it.

I liked it, so I put a ring on it!

Ok, flashback about 4 years ago.  I was doing some serious soul-searching and really asking myself what I wanted for my life.  One of the things I did during this tough valley was to craft my bucket list.  I didn't give myself any restrictions or limits on what I put on the list other than I had to be willing to actually make it happen.  At the turn of each year, I've re-evaluated the list, adding and removing things as I grow more and more aware of my real wants in life.

For a little background, I got married in college.  It was a cheap ceremony, with a cheaper dress,  and even cheaper rings.  So one of the things I decided I really wanted for MYSELF was a ring I got just for me.  Having priced out a custom engagement ring for our 10th anniversary that we never actually decided to go through with (in retrospect, this may have been a sign?)  I had a mental budget of $10,000. 

So when the big 4-0 rolled around this June, I decided the milestone birthday deserved a milestone bucket list item.  Ring?  Yes, PLEASE!  However, one of the things I decided in the past few years was that $10,000 was more than I wanted to spend on darn near any single thing (prolly why I'm still driving my 2011 paid-for toyota?) 

And the other thing that continues to be top of my list? T-R-A-V-E-L! 

So today, I oscillated to the perfect solution.  I have a good friend at work who conveniently does custom jewelry as his hobby.  I've been eyeing Fish Head Jewelry on Facebook for a few years now and decided THIS was my ring maker!  Solitaire diamond?  No way.  I wanted something uniquely me.  Richard Kollath brought his mad ring skills to bear and I got not 1, but 3 amazing rings and I still have room for a few trips to Europe!  WIN-WIN! :o) 

Thanks Richard for making one of this girl's bucket list dreams come true, Beyonce has nothing on these beauties!

Status-quoted

I am a leader.  And I am a damned good one. 

Do you know how hard it is to write those 2 sentences?  A decade ago, I wouldn't have dreamed it.  And even now its a stretch to admit it, even when I know with every fiber in my being that it is true.  This is what its like being a professional woman today.  We are constantly fighting mixed messages.  Its no wonder why we don't feel like we know the next steps to be successful in our careers and why we all feel plagued with the imposter syndrome.  We are taught to play nice, get along, don't stand out.  But some of those characteristics do not align with society's perception of leaders.  More importantly, these attributes do not allow someone to get recognized as having leadership potential, which is really the key to being able to USE those skills to benefit an organization.

Do you know what has been on my end-of-year feedback every year since I started my professional career?  For those that like numbers, thats 17 years now....  "Communication style is too blunt, direct, opinionated"  Some variant of that.  Do you want to know the skill I'm most proud of?  THIS ONE.    I've honed my communication style to a razor sharp-edge, and weld it with precision and confidence.  Am I still direct?  Absolutely.  However, I prefer to classify my communication style as succinct and efficient.   I'm also very empathetic and I am usually perceptive when reading my audience, so I can adapt the directness of my message as appropriate.  Thats what 17 years practice at your "weakness" gets you, a focused strength.  You know what else?  I've probably had a dozen other leaders reach out to me over the past several years to mentor their employees (usually female).  Specifically they ask me to "teach her how to use her voice".  That feels like sweet justice to me.

Another title that comes along with women that are growing in their successes at work "quickly"?  Career climber.  Someone mentioned to me in the last year that they'd overheard me called this.  I can't tell you how shocked and hurt this made me feel.  Anyone that has read this blog can probably tell there was no planning or pre-meditation in my career path to-date.  Just circumstance, decision, circumstance, decision.  My career lean-in truly started with the catastrophic event of my divorce,  and from my perspective, I didn't even really have a choice.  All along the way since then, I've assessed each new role to see if it was going to grow and engage ME and what would be the impact of the role on me/my family.  One of the hardest things about careers is taking on new roles and then being willing to un-take them if they don't meet your needs or if you can tell you aren't meeting theirs.  One thing I tell every person I mentor is to figure out the right role duration for you.  I've found 2 years to be a good measure for me, I spend the first year learning and the second year improving/training my replacement.   Its long enough for me to stay fully engaged and giving my all, while short enough that I can still enjoy doing the not-fun aspects of the job.

So why do I think I'm a good leader?  Because I'm not afraid to make and own the "decision".  I've come to realize that being a decision maker is actually really hard for most of the population.  This is another one of weaknesses cited in my past performance reviews that is truly one of my strengths.  I think the key to being the decision maker is in the owning though.  I accept that I will not always make the right decision.  But I also know that my team is strong enough to handle the consequences of my incorrect decisions.  I work hard to get everyone onboard with the decision (which is usually based on the data my team has provided), I continually communicate the WHY and if I have the ability, I'll work to coordinate a backup plan B, C, D for if the initial decision doesn't work.  This helps the team have faith in me as a leader and concurrence with the starting decision, because we've had the forethought to plan in alternative paths.

So yeah, the moral here after a lot of soul-searching on my career this summer?  I am a leader.  And a damned good one.  And if that means I'm a career climber too?  So be it.  I hear those V.P.s have pretty nice offices and I'm ready to grow my skills to get one.  I feel I bring a perspective and a voice thats needed.

Seasons of Life, Leanin' In

Well, after 8 months of self-imposed recovery from burnout at work, I have spent the last two months sitting on the feeling that its time for me to take that next step in my own growth and development at work.  I have loved every minute of my training role, from the complete open-endedness of the problem space to the opportunity to work with an elite, like-minded team that just... "gets shit done".  We officially launched our big initiative live in June and since then, this growing sense inside me has been, "you have completed this part of the journey, its time for you to move on". 

For years (decades), I have blocked this voice inside me.  I could blame societal pressures and social cues, but ultimately I made a choice to stay content with the status-quo and to play small.  But the older I get, the more that desire to play small has faded.  That isn't why God designed me and its my job in this lifetime to actually try to accomplish what he DID design me for.  And that, my friends, is what that voice is inside me, the cue to steer me toward God's path. 

So I'm really focusing on listening these days.  And I fully believe there are signs along the way, if you are tuned in. 

Sign 1: 4 weeks ago, something happened at work that really shook me up.  And it was enough of a shock that I recognized it as sign 1 that maybe it was time to make a move on my path.  So I reached out to my network to see what other job opportunities were available on the horizon.  I know long term that I'd like to be positioned for international travel roles (shocker i know!), so my discussions centered on opportunities in other areas of the company, namely Program Management and Sales/Marketing.   After several discussions, I decided I'd wait a little longer for the right opportunity.

Sign 2: 3 weeks ago, one of my friends reached out with an open requisition for a Program Manager role in a completely different business unit from the place I've lived my entire career at RC.  I read the role, thought on it a long while, and came back to same thought as before... I'll just wait.

Sign 3:  2 weeks ago, I got a call from another friend, in the SAME business unit, asking if I'd be interested in an engineering leadership position in this SAME business unit.  Well folks?  For me, 3 signs is the charm...  I  knew this was where I was supposed to be going.  But I had also decided when I moved to my current training role in January that my next move needed to be something other than engineering, 17+ years is enough of one viewpoint.  So when I got off the phone, I updated my resume and applied to the Program Manager role.

And yesterday?  I accepted a new position as a Program Manager on a big strategic program, in a role I've never done.  I'll be going back full-time in a week, with Bella's blessing.   My amazingly supportive parents have agreed to help me as I make this transition back to a challenging full-time role, thank GOD for my village.

And thank you GOD for the signs!  I'm listening and I'm ready!

Flat tire blues

Well one of my 40th year bucket list items is FAST approaching!  I decided this was the year I was going to do the FULL week of RAGBRAI.  Of course, going in a rag-virgin, I had no real concept of the needed amount of training when I blissfully signed up.  I happened to chat with a coworker that has done RAGBRAI for years and asked her how much time she spent on her bike through the summer to get ready.  At the time, I was aiming for 2-3 rides a week of about 15-20 miles each.  When she told me she logged 100+ a week, all summer, I seriously wondered what I'd gotten myself into!

So June saw me stepping up my biking game so that I didn't actually die in my 40th year of life.  Since I have Monday and Friday off, I don't really have any excuse for not finding the time to get on my bike, right?  In conjunction with my training step-up plan, Bella found out she got accepted into the University of Iowa Junior Volunteer program.  This meant that I was officially trapped in Iowa City for 3 hours every Monday morning, while Bella worked her volunteer shift at hospital.  PERFECT!  Lets go explore the Iowa City trail system!!!

The Terry Trueblood recreation area is fabulous and connects to the Iowa River Trail, so with a bit of creative looping, I figured out how to get 30 not-too-completely-boring-mile rides in.  By end of June, I had a pretty good Monday routine going.  Then one morning as I beat Bella to the car to load up my bike, I ran into the thing I have dreaded most as a bike rider, a bike tire FLAT.  My very first one!!!!  SON OF A.....  Well, I threw that bike and its sadly deflated front wheel into the car, hell-bent on getting my ride in.  I dropped Bella at hospital at 9am and checked on opening time at World of Bikes, 10 am - POOH.  So I drove to the shop to wait and decided, fuck it, I'm gonna figure this out myself, I have a cell phone with google and a stubborn attitude.  :o)  So after watching a great video and pulling all the tools out of my pouch (including the spare tube), in 15 minutes I had managed to get that new tube inflated and bike tire reinstalled!  WOOT!  I threw bike back in car and headed to the rec area.  Luckily the recreation area is a 2 mile loop around a pond.  Not fully trusting my tire handiwork, I decided to do a few loops around the pond for safe measure as I'd much rather walk a bike with a flat back 2 miles instead of 12...  After about 4 loops, I finally had confidence that I had successfully taken care of the tire and went off on my normal route knocking out a 20 mile ride.

Fast forward to this Monday.  I was running late, so I threw bike into car as usual but didn't spend time checking tires.  Instead I threw my pump into back, with plan to pump up tires when I got the rec area.  As I pull bike out, much to my disappointment, my BACK TIRE had a flat.  FUCK FUCK FUCK.  This is a little more tricky as there are all these geary things hooked onto the back tire.  UGHHHH.  But you know what?  I flipped the front tire in a matter of minutes, surely this wouldn't be that bad.  And since I'd just blown a tire 2 weeks ago, I had conveniently solicited Amazon Prime for a pack of new tire tubes, just in case.  So after about 15 minutes of fighting, I had back tire off and the tube out of tire.  There was a really tiny hole.  I have a patch kit in my tool set, but wasn't fully sure how to use it successfully so I pulled out the brand new tube I'd ordered.  I'm about 30 min in now and sweating, did I mention it was nearing 90 out?  Finally I get the tube in and the tire reinstalled back on rim.  Time to pump it up and get going, whew!!!  So I started pumping away, targeting my 100 PSI marker.  It was at about 90 when I heard a loud pop. You have GOT to be kidding me???  The new tube blew!   I'm officially dripping in sweat and covered in bike grease and I really want to throw something or sit down and cry.

So I took a deep breath, went and got some wet wipes out of front of car and wiped myself off and took a drink of water and asked myself why was this frickin' bike tire making me this upset?  Turns out, it was way more than the tire behind my mood. 

I'd just been through another round on Tinder, to no avail.  At this point, my Tinder tolerance is all of a week, before I need to shut down my account for a few months.  This last round culminated with me all excited for a first date with a new guy.  I happened to find out we had a mutual friend before the date.  I reached out to friend to get the down-low on the guy and my friend kindly but strongly warned me off saying this guy was a serial womanizer.

BLEHHHH....

This is the flat tire of dating life.   Its frustrating and sometimes it hurts.  But as I sat there sweating and stewing, I decided, you know what?  I still want to ride, both my bike AND this crazy roller coaster called love.  So I patched the original tube with my patch kit and I got my bike ride in on Monday.  And I'm giving myself a Tinder break for a month and then I'm getting back on the roller coaster.  I still believe he is out there, so I'm going to keep riding and one of these days, I'll find my unicorn.    But I sure hope he knows how to change flat bike tires!!!

LIFT like a BEAST!

With the crazy over the past year between new house, stressful job, teenage kids (aka LIFE), I had been abysmal on "taking care of me".  I had been seeing the scale tick up over the past 12 months and by January, I decided enough was enough. 

Of course, diet is the root of it all, so I went back to my tried-and-true keto diet (seriously, if you can get into ketosis and stay there, its like having a SUPERPOWER!)  Additionally, I stepped up my cardio game again.  I absolutely love cardio because it puts me in a zen-like state where I can work through problems that are plaguing me and really helps me with my mental health.

But the real solution for keeping weight off?  Its power weight training. WHAT the WHAT??  Yep, you read that right.  I thought I'd share some insights into this technique as women don't naturally consider this when looking for ways to maintain physical health.  So let me just wax poetic for a few minutes on the benefits of weight training....

It causes you to lose fat.
BAM!  Muscle is essentially the engine for your body.  By building muscle, you are increasing your metabolism/engine capacity and you can burn more fuel, aka calories.

It helps decrease risk of osteoporosis.
As you build up core strength, you are also increasing bone density.  This also helps with posture and lower back pain.  Hitting 40, I'm starting to "feel my age" so anything that can help make it a little less painful to get out of bed is a win in my book.

It enhances mood and reduces stress!
This is by far my favorite benefit.  After spending an hour in my FUNgeon, I feel incredibly powerful, like I can take on the world!!!

Here's where I started, the basic Starting Strength for beginners program.  I used this for the first few months back into weightlifting, starting with the following weights:

Bench = 50 lbs
Deadlifts = 105 lbs
Squats = 125 lbs

Once I had stabilized into the habit of lifting 2-3 times per week consistently for 3 months, I purchased a weight lifting app for my phone, the StrongLifts program, which has expanded my range of exercises and increased the amount of my work sets.  I opted to pay the $10 for the full version, and I think it was well worth it as it takes all the thinking out of determining warmup sets or doing weight plate math.  :o)

Here's where I'm at today:                                                  My End of Summer Goals:
Bench = 105 lbs ~ 1.6x stronger!                                        135 lbs
Deadlifts = 195 lbs ~1.7x stronger!                                     250 lbs
Squats = 205 lbs ~1.5x stronger!                                         250 lbs
"New" Overhead press = 50 lbs                                             75  lbs
"New" Bent over row = 75 lbs                                             125 lbs

BRING ON THE WEIGHTS!